On Disappointment
I’d long since stopped caring too much about my own disappointment, yet I’ve been almost pathologically concerned with not disappointing other people. That was what I had learned to do. That is what you do learn to do when you are in an abusive relationship and you get disappointment after disappointment after disappointment. Since you can’t stop the disappointments happening, you learn not to feel the pain. You make yourself go numb to it. That was what I had done.