13,000 miles from home, I was sitting at a kitchen table talking relationships with Karina, a new friend, when she said something that stopped me in my tracks:
“You just know.”
The conversation had turned to Sue, friend of hers, who’d settled for a “friendship with benefits”, and had a child by her “friend” – and room-mate […]
Be sure to answer his text messages. He’s sent you a text which means he, clearly, expects an answer. So, you’d better give him one, hadn’t you? No matter that he doesn’t answer your messages when it doesn’t suit him. That’s different, isn’t it?
Try very hard to have the last word. I understand it means […]
One thing that makes it so hard to move on for all abused women, including Adele (who we met in last week’s ezine) is the legitimate sense of grievance we have. We have been wronged, big time. So, it would be nice to have some acknowledgement of the wrong that’s been done to us – […]
Adele’s eyes filled with tears as she said: “I can’t bear for people to hate me.” Who were those “people” she was talking about? Why, her abusive ex-partner, and his family – of course. The same family, you understand, who had welcomed her with open arms, and even told her – rightly – what a […]
“Don’t mind if I fall apart, there’s more room in a broken heart” as Carly Simon famously sang (Coming Around Again) As you know to your cost, an abusive man doesn’t need those words of reassurance. He really won’t mind if you fall apart – provided you do it quietly enough. Of course, if you […]
Are you struggling with the “G” word? Struggling to say “goodbye” and mean it? When is the last word finally final? When do you say, “I’m through with trying to get that abusive man to listen to what I’m saying?” – and mean it?
Is it:
a) when he actually listens
b) when you get bored
c) when he […]
Keep telling yourself why you needed the relationship to work. You went into the relationship wanting and needing certain things. Your abusive partner failed to deliver these on a regular, predictable, consistent basis. And yet you’re still holding onto the hope that he could deliver… one day.. If you used UPS, and they only delivered, […]
Emotionally abused women are a tender-hearted lot. You could say we’re too tender-hearted for our own good. When we fall in love we tend to treat our beloved too well, for too long. Especially when he turns into a jerk.
There’s nothing wrong with loving a man well and long. However, these days I’m only prepared […]
Have you ever had that sinking feeling when you discovered you were doing something you hoped you never would? Like turning into your mother? (Ouch!)
This week, I had one of those moments when I was talking with my lovely mentor, Alexandra Watson. We were talking about what gets in the way of women’s happiness. (In […]
There’s something a tad controversial that I need to say. If you’ve ever been in an abusive relationship, need to know that somehow, at some point in your life, you were programmed to be “a victim in waiting”. It’s not who you truly are, and it’s absolutely NOT an accurate reflection of your inner courage […]
Over the next 5 days, I'll send you some lessons and tips that I've found have really helped women to heal from narcissistic abuse. Starting with the basics.
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