So, how could you have spotted him, had you been that way minded? Let’s count the ways:
First, as mentioned last week, intuition raised the red flag.
Second, there was something about his social persona that you didn’t quite like. Was he a bit boastful? A bit self-centred? Self-opinionated? Did he thrill, almost embarrassingly, to the sound […]
When bad things happen – like an abusive man tearing apart the fragile fabric of your life –it’s a huge thing to deal with. So, you really don’t want to feel in any way responsible for what happened to you.
A lot of women tell me they couldn’t possibly have seen it coming. Nobody saw it […]
As the mother of three young children, Nuala is struggling to come to terms with walking away from an emotionally abusive husband. She’s strong, she’s bright, she’s unusually clear about the reality of the situation – maybe because she’s a coach – and, like every other woman in her situation, she’s frightened.
She’s frightened about her […]
“You talk about the pursuit of happiness, don’t you?” my lovely partner said, looked at me almost accusingly. (He doesn’t really do “accusing.” )
“Absolutely not”, I replied. “As far as I can see, the faster you pursue happiness, the faster it runs away from you.”
The pursuit of happiness is a great and romantic notion. Too often, […]
Live in “I’ll Be Happy When” mode… much as you know that doesn’t work. You won’t Be-Happy-When for two very good reasons; first because chances are it ain’t going to happen and, second, external events are never going to make you happy until you commit to making yourself happy, right here, right now.
Allow people close […]
As women, we pride ourselves on caring. It’s something we do wonderfully well. And it’s something even the most self-effacing of us pride ourselves on. We have a caring heart. We want to save our loved ones – and possibly the World – with our caring.
So can we really care too much?
What do you think?
The […]
Have you noticed how often some people say: “I can’t”?
Maybe you’ve even been guilty of saying it yourself… once, or twice. (I know I have.)
The trouble with “I can’t” is this: it sounds SO convincing, doesn’t it? Something happens, the fears kick into play, and they trigger that well-worn “I can’t” mechanism.
“I CAN’T” flashes across […]
Common things occur most commonly. Miracles are known to be a bit harder to come by… And abused women tend to have a really, really bad gambling habit, don’t they? Inasmuch as they gamble on getting the one miracle they want, which is…
Their very own Mr Nasty shedding his fangs, sheathing his claws, doing a […]
One of my abusive ex-husband’s favorite sayings in the whole world was: “You don’t understand. You just don’t understand…” It was delivered with a shake of the head, and an expression of either anger or disappointment, depending on my crime or misdemeanour.
My inability to understand was one of the great disappointments of his life – […]
If you’ve ever had a child, or been a child yourself, you probably know the song “Heigh ho” from “Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs”. Strange as it may sound, emotionally abused women have a similar work ethic to the Seven Dwarfs. Remember these lines?
“We dig dig dig dig dig dig dig in our mine
the […]
Over the next 5 days, I'll send you some lessons and tips that I've found have really helped women to heal from narcissistic abuse. Starting with the basics.
Want daily reassurance and inspiration? Sign up to my Instagram account. @dr_anniephd
