What are you NOT seeing?

10 May 2011

Claire spent a lot of years in a toxic marriage, bringing up her 3 children the best way she could.

And – like every abused woman I’ve ever known – she made an amazingly good job of it.  She managed to give far more care, love and respect than she’d received.

How did she do it?

Let me answer that question with a question: how do you do it?

Did you know…

the well spring of healthy feelings never, actually, runs dry.  Not even when your heart feels as arid as the Nevada desert.

The day finally came when even Clare could see she had done all she possibly could for her children.

And she needed some love for herself… A man came along who said the right things.  His words were like precious rain on her parched heart.

How could she not love this man who had stopped the drought?

Except, of course, that he hadn’t.  He was a practised abuser, and he drip-fed her, just long enough to make her love and need him.

Claire’s suffering, second time round, was even more agonizing than before.

But this is where the story gets really interesting.

Claire and I are working together, to help her to find peace of mind and clarity.  She doesn’t blame herself anymore.  She understands what happened, and the kind of man that can behave that badly.

We talked the other day, about the kind of man who wants your best for you; the kind of selfless man who wants to help you spread your wings, so you can fly.

Claire said, in that small, miserable voice I’ve heard so many times before: “Do men like that really exist?”

Later she told me about her friend, Brian.  Brian is teaching her to drive; so she can have the freedom to go where she wants when she wants.  Brian’s not her driving instructor; he’s a friend.  And he cares about her enough to give up his spare time to help her, for free.

She’s known him for years.  He’s always been supportive, encouraging… and selfless.  There’s no: “I’ve done this for you, so you have to do X for me.”

Claire hadn’t really noticed Brian.  She hadn’t noticed that men like Brian exist in her world.  She hadn’t even registered that Brian treats her like she’s special.

Why not?

She was still scarred by the 7 Wounds that keep all abused women stuck, frightened, and vulnerable.

Those wounds dictate what you register and what you don’t in your world.

Those wounds dictate whether good or bad things happen to you, and whether or not you let bad people close to you.

In short, those wounds colour your world so that life will hurt you, rather than heal you.

It doesn’t have to be that way.

I invite you to entertain a new idea, just for the length of this blog post, please.

I invite you to think that, if you’re hurting, it’s not that you can’t be healed, it’s only that you don’t know how, yet.

I invite you to think that life only ever deals us hurts that we are able to heal, so we can find happiness, love, and meaning in our world…

Do you carry on letting those 7 wounds scar your life, or do you, focus on how much better your life will be without them?

If you knew that there was a step-by-step, foolproof, proven program that could show you how to heal those wounds, would you invest in yourself and commit just one day of your life to go through a workshop that will benefit you for a lifetime?

This is the only course I’ve ever done solely dedicated to healing your wounds, and it features all my most up-to-date insights, inspirations and techniques in a fool-proof, step-by-step format that’s a breeze to follow.

I’m running this program as a face to face workshop because i is the most effective and economical way of creating, in the shortest possible time, the maximum transformation, that will benefit your for a lifetime.

Do you carry on letting those 7 wounds scar your life, or do you, focus on how much better your life will be without them?

If you knew that there was a step-by-step, foolproof, proven program that could show you how to heal those wounds, would you invest in yourself and commit just one day of your life to go through a workshop that will benefit you for a lifetime?

This is the only course I’ve ever done solely dedicated to healing your wounds, and it features all my most up-to-date insights, inspirations and techniques in a fool-proof, step-by-step format that’s a breeze to follow.

I’m running this program as a face to face workshop because it is the most effective and economical way of creating, in the shortest possible time, the maximum transformation, that will benefit your for a lifetime.

CLICK HERE to find out why this workshop is tailored to your needs.

People can always do the thing they say they can’t.  Every abused woman I’ve ever worked with could do the thing she said she couldn’t.  You can do the thing you say you can’t. Please, take that first step today.CLICK HERE to discover how to heal the wounds you thought you couldn’t heal.

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Annie Kaszina, international Emotional Abuse Recovery specialist and award-winning author of 3 books designed to help women recognise and heal from toxic relationships so that they can build healthy, lasting relationships with the perfect partner for them, blogs about all aspects of abuse, understanding Narcissists and how to avoid them and building strong self-worth. To receive Annie’s blog direct to your Inbox just leave your details here.

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