Half An Orange And You

28 Jul 2010

You might be wondering whether I have taken leave of my

After all what has any orange, whole or halved, to do with
emotional abuse? 

Not a lot.  

But think book titles, specifically:  “Meeting Your Half-Orange”, by Amy Spencer. The half-orange is a translation of the Spanish phrase mi
media naranja
, which means “my
half-orange”; use to describe, in love, one’s sweetheart, one’s beautifully
perfect other half.

Now, what’s a book about
meeting your half-orange, from Dating Optimist Amy Spencer, possibly got to do with
where you are now in your life? 

The fact that you are
reading this blog tends to suggest that you have been struggling to transform
the very sour half-lemon in your life into a half-orange, and failing

It’s not surprising.  And it’s not your fault.  

For two reasons.  First, as you already know to your cost, there
are no magic wands; and lemons don’t turn into oranges.  Second, ‘your’ half-lemon is very happy to
be a half-lemon; he enjoys being so sour as to be thoroughly unpleasant. 

You want sweetness in
your life; all he ever offers you is sourness. 
Because that is all he wants you to have.

 (Of course, there were
the few good times at the start of the relationship, but those were just to
grab your attention and get you hooked on him.

Dating is probably the
last thing on your mind right now.  And rightly
You have every reason to fear
meeting another half-lemon – until you can grasp all that is fantastic and
valuable about you.

“Meeting Your Half-Orange”
has a great message for you.  The
message is about who you need to be – and can be – in order to have a happy
life.  Amy Spencer argues that in order
to meet a great partner, you need to be the vibrant, fantastic person that you
really are. 

Now, I have a fair idea
of the kind of things your abusive half-lemon has said about you.  (My half-lemon said the same things, give or take a bit, to me.)  They weren’t complimentary.  And they are certainly not true.  It’s just a fact that a sour person will say
sour things – that’s an integral part of his job description.  (And how he loves that job

You don’t need to think
about dating, to start to upgrade the view you have of yourself.  Amy Spencer provides you with some great tools
to discover how fantastic you really are. 

Your abusive partner had
a vested interest in turning you into the shadow of a person.  That is what it takes for him to feel
worthwhile and important.  But you don’t
have to go there.

Let go of his vision of

Reclaim who you are.  Amy Spencer
can give you some fantastic pointers to do just that.  

Whether or not you are
ever going to want to meet your half-orange, you owe it to yourself to become
the sweet, juicy, perfectly lovable person you truly are.










Annie Kaszina, international Emotional Abuse Recovery specialist and award-winning author of 3 books designed to help women recognise and heal from toxic relationships so that they can build healthy, lasting relationships with the perfect partner for them, blogs about all aspects of abuse, understanding Narcissists and how to avoid them and building strong self-worth. To receive Annie’s blog direct to your Inbox just leave your details here.

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