Emotional Abuse

Have you ever felt disappointed with yourself because you let yourself be discouraged from pursuing the things that excite you or matter to you? Do you have an issue with goal-setting and goal-hitting? If so, this article will help you understand how that came about, why it is not your fault and what you can […]

This is the time of year when there is significant social and media pressure to look back, look forward and make Resolutions.  If looking back is painful, looking forward is anxiety-provoking and focusing on the Resolutions that you could make to “improve yourself” makes you feel uncomfortable, here’s what to do instead.  These thoughts spring […]

How do you survive trauma? That is a question that I have been asking myself a lot over the past few months.  Because the past few months have provided me with what has felt like a constant, overwhelming supply of trauma. That is why I have been so uncharacteristically silent on my blog and newsletter, […]

How do you cope when you feel like your heart is breaking? Especially when that feeling becomes a long-term problem for you as it does in an abusive relationship.  Narcissists will keep on breaking your heart for as long as you give them access to it.
The disbelief factor
When a reality is too hard to accept, […]

Just for a moment, I want you to stop and think about what you really owe people.  You see, I am guessing that this may be very different from what you think you owe people. Getting clear on that difference could massively reduce your stress levels and, also, transform the way you feel about relationships […]

This week, we need to come at the problem of abuse recovery from the opposite end of the question.  Instead of what looking at what wounded you, I feel we need to look at what makes you special. But before we get underway, a caveat.
Just in case that, doubting nasty little voice in your head […]

This week, we need to talk about “being a burden”. Recently, the notion of Being a Burden has kept popping up all over the place, for me. When this happens, I like to think it is the Universe’s way of saying, “Hey! You need to be doing something to help exorcise this destructive belief.” Since […]

“Did it really have to be that way?” is the question that you ask yourself over and over again when a bad relationship fails.  Human beings, in general, show no fondness for situations that end in failure and disappointment.  Empaths who feel the need to please others hate an unhappy ending and feel duty-bound to […]

Toxic people are scary. But are they really that smart? If you are to salvage your self-esteem from  your relationship breakup and – ideally, a modicum of financial security  – you need to  stay in your own power.  That means not being overwhelmed and intimidated by the games that a Narcissist plays and the fear […]

My beautiful friend Charlotte* received some stunning jewellery from her husband in the course of her long marriage.  The guy had great taste.  Every piece was exquisite and immensely covetable. She wore that jewellery from time to time, with pride but never joy. That worked for Mr Beautiful Jewellery Picker (BJP). This week we need […]