One of those lies you just don’t forget
What was your parents’ relationship with the truth like? I ask because my trip to Venice – sadly now behind me – brought up a few memories about my own parents’- complicated – relationship with the truth.
Venice, mosquitos and me
My association with Venice goes back a very long […]
When a narcissistic relationship ends, the person who has suffered all the abuse is not in their most resourceful mind. The victim has been subjected (by the Narcissist) to so much blame and so many (ludicrous) accusations of being the Narcissist that she gets everything back to front. All the victim’s compassion goes out to the narcissistic abuser. All her condemnation seems to fall back onto herself.
You find you are blaming yourself for provoking their toxic behaviour – when you did no such thing – and seeing getting back with them as a return to paradise.
So, how do you prevent that from happening?
Narcissists do things that remind you how little you matter to them all the time. They do that even when their narrative tells you something completely different. They can tell you how much they love you even while they show you how untrue that is. Or else, they can tell you and show you how little they care but still leave you in magnificent, world-class denial searching for the goodness that you know is locked deep inside them.
How important for you is the desire – even the need – to communicate? I am guessing it must be pretty important otherwise you probably wouldn’t be reading this now. Because I am someone who uses a lot of words – carefully chosen words, I’d like to think – to get my thoughts and ideas across.
How comfortable do you feel with drawing a line in the sand and saying, “You know what? This is actually your problem and I am not going to make it mine?”
Or does it make you feel uncomfortable because it was something that an abuser used to detach from you – most commonly when you most […]
What do you think is the biggest hold that a Narcissist has on the people who love them?
In the end, it comes down to fear. That fear manifests in a multitude of concerns including:
I won’t be able to cope on my own – financially or emotionally.
They’ll replace me effortlessly thereby proving how worthless I am.
One […]
How kind are you to yourself really?
How often do you tread carefully so as not to hurt your own delicate feelings, the way you would with a friend?
Or when it comes to you, do you tend to adopt the tough love approach – only with the emphasis entirely on the tough piece?
If you are like […]
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