Women’s Emotional Abuse Recovery

How you leave an abusive relationship

Everything Susie said was self-critical. She should have jumped by now. She should have left her abusive husband. Susie wasn’t prepared to cut herself any slack at all. Intellectually, she knew everything I – or anyone else – could tell her. But, still, there she was, paralyzed… (Because it’s not what you know with your head that matters; what matters is getting your heart to the point of letting go of a relationship that does NOT work.)
Susie’s knowledge hadn’t percolated through to heart level, yet.

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Abusive Men – Why They Don’t Want You To Be Happy

The abusive man is looking for someone who will serve him 24-7 in various departments of his life: the bedroom, the kitchen, the finance department, parenting – both of his children, and himself – and so on, and so forth. But more than that, the abusive man is someone who will carry a heavy load of loathing – his loathing both for himself and for other people. He is looking for someone he can dump that load on, forever after.

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Falling in love stinks when…

Falling-In-Love, as far as I can see, is about leaping without looking. Falling-In-Love lays you open to the whole unsavory pack of jerks, abusers, and narcissists. I asked my client whether she would take a job without first finding out about the pay and terms of employment. She sounded surprised. She answered, briskly: “Of course not.” Then she saw the connection. You don’t have to fall in love on Day 1, Day 2, or Day 20. Falling-In-Love is optional, not obligatory – although it is a neat way of silencing the little voice in your head that says: “Er… I don’t think so. This one is NOT for me!”

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“I’m Not Sure I Am An Abused Woman…”

Your husband tells you that you are selfish, self-centred, and you have ruined your his life. What a poor hard done by victim he is! But, also, what a negative, critical, fault-finding, punitive, blaming partner he is. If he’s that unhappy, why hasn’t he left you long ago? Unless, the reason he stays with you is because, actually, he enjoys blaming you for ‘ruining his life’… I’m guessing your husband gets a real high out of telling you how awful you are. Now, in my book, that is selfish, and destructive. It is the hallmark of an abusive man.

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“Why Do You Think It Is So Easy To Change The People-Pleasing Habit?”

You’ve spent your time being nice to – that is doing back flips to please – a man who treats you badly –and, all the while, treating yourself badly, when you could get to treat yourself well. It’s never about changing away from being nice. It’s all about loving yourself first, and not casting pearls before swine…

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Brainwashed By The “Misery Trilogy”!

It’s not unusual for clients to tell me what they should do, or what they need to do. And we’re not just talking about goal setting here. Abused women often tell me that they have to stop waiting for an abusive partner to change. Or they should take better care of themselves. Or they need to believe they deserve a better life. What they don’t know is that they’ve been brainwashed by the “Misery Trilogy”!

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“Does he get the blame for everything?”

How do I determine my part to his actions? He can’t have an argument by himself. So, what I have done in my actions that may have set the course for some of the abuse. There are always two sides to the story. Or does he just get blamed for everything?

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Why Relationships Don’t Work

Not all women are abused at some point in there life – although a lot are. Not a lot of us are taught how to make good relationships. Instead, we’re taught how to put ourselves last. After 7 years of research, I’ve written a report about how women are PROGRAMMED to sabotage their relationship chances.

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Nobody Ever Told Me…

It wasn’t that long ago that I realized something important.Nobody ever told me which part of fairy tales to believe. I mean, we all know that fairy tales are…

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“What if he were gay?”

The sexuality of abusive men is perverted. They use – or withhold – sex for control, not love. They ‘relate’ to their partner in a damaging way. That is a feature of the breed. I am very happy to generalize about abusive men; because they are, ultimately, eerily like clones. They all share the same loathing for women. They all abuse their partners in very similar ways.

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The 5 Simple Steps to Healing from Narcissistic Abuse

Over the next 5 days, I'll send you some lessons and tips that I've found have really helped women to heal from narcissistic abuse.  Starting with the basics.

GET THE 5 SIMPLE STEPS

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