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What makes it so hard to recognise a controlling, abusive partner for the toxic creature that they truly are?  Why is it that the people who love them find it so hard to make sense of the controlling abusive partner’s behavior?  And why does all the information that they have about control have so little […]

Who would not want to have closure from their emotionally abusive relationship?  You have been forced to admit that the harmonious relationship that you desired can never be on offer.  It is only normal to longer for the compensation of a gracious ending that melds finality with peace of mind.  Is it really too much […]

Have you ever had a problem with loyalty? Or, more correctly, have you ever had a problem with other people who have a problem with loyalty?  I am guessing that you have.  Maybe that problem still shows up in your life.  It is just not possible to go through an emotionally abusive relationship without acquiring […]

Have you ever used the seemingly innocent little phrase, “I know this sounds stupid but…” (or else its close relative, “I’m probably being stupid but…”)?  “I know this sounds stupid but…” is a  little phrase  that is common enough to pass more or less unnoticed.  But don’t be fooled. It is a little phrase can […]

Have you ever struggled to believe that your abusive, narcissistic partner can help it? Have you ever explained and excused their behaviour on the grounds that they don’t mean it or else have been so damaged that they can’t help themselves? If so, you might like to consider the different ways in which you and […]

Q. How would you know if your abusive, Narcissistic partner is really an emotional toddler?
A.  The chances are, you probably wouldn’t. For the longest time.  And the reason why is simple.  Once the dust settled and the shallow facade of charm disappeared, you had no option but to show up as an adult in the […]

Q.  How do you know who is the real victim in the situation when you are in a relationship with an abusive narcissist
A.  Chances are, you don’t feel not entirely sure.  Your partner has no doubt whatsoever that he (or she) is without blame, having been horribly and consistently wronged – by you (allegedly). You, […]

How could he treat me that way?” was the question that I asked myself endlessly when I was with my emotionally abusive partner.  In the years since, I have worked with many hundreds of women. None of them could come to terms with why an abusive partner treats you that way. Only much, much later […]

Did You Fall in Love with a Sales Pitch?
Have you ever said of your narcissistic and abusive partner, “But they have so much potential…”? If you have not, I would be truly surprised. “But they have so much potential…” is the thing that all partners of an abuser say.
Nobody that I have ever come across […]