Women’s Emotional Abuse Recovery

We need to talk about The Silent Treatment, the technique of sulking to make a person feel rejected and abandoned that so many abusers employ to crush their partners, children or other family members. The truth is that The Silent Treatment is a weapon that abusers use to wound you deeply – without the perpetrator […]

“I know you better than you know yourself.” was one of my father’s favorite phrases*. He used it to shape my perceptions of him – and also what I projected onto him.  In this article we need to look at the various aspects of projection – that is the transfer of desires, beliefs and emotions […]

Having a child changes you – unless, that is, you are a Narcissist. (Nothing changes a Narcissist.)  “Having a child, my mother often said, “requires you to become selfless.” My mother did – and didn’t – have a point.  
Having a child opens your eyes to your own childhood
Having a child requires you put another […]

Emotional abuse creates a deep sense of loss.  It takes you into an acutely painful place of exclusion.  It leads you to look at the rest of the world and see everyone else as other than you.  Other in the sense of happier and more blessed. From where you are standing, that feels horribly real […]

“If at first you don’t succeed, try, try and try again.” said Robert the Bruce, allegedly.  On the strength of that pronouncement, Robert sounds a likely candidate for patron saint of victims of emotional and narcissistic abuse. The strategy of all abuse victims is to keep trying harder. But what are the contraindications? What are […]

What makes it so hard to let go of an abusive, Narcissistic partner?  Where do you find an answer that makes sense to the abused partner and the concerned onlooker?  Love is the most  commonly cited “reason”.  But is that really accurate?  Do people really love the partner who abuses them?
When pressed, the abused partner […]

What do you do about an abusive grandparent, parent or other senior? What happens when they reappear in your adult life in full abusive mode?  And why does it happen, anyway?
Most commonly it happens when, as they perceive it, you are denying them something that they feel entitled to. That “something” can change from person […]

You don’t have to be with a narcissistic, emotional abuser for long before your sense of common decency is outraged. The longer you are with them, the more frequent the outrage – and the more your heart breaks.  You find yourself asking two questions over and over again, “How can they even behave like that?” […]

 Did your induction into the crazy, skewed world of abusive people start in childhood? That is how it works for many of us. We were born into damaged – and damaging – families. Our parents  or other family members  likely grew up in an environment where their own emotional needs were rarely met – at […]