The last couple of weeks chez Kaszina have been overshadowed by the figure of The Driving Instructor; in point of fact the
short, stout figure of ‘Kev’, as of today my daughter’s ex-driving instructor. Kev presents as a twinkly, jokey sort of bloke, short on words
but long on salt of the earth good humour.
Unfortunately the good guy veneer is […]
Have you ever had one of those ‘karma moments’ when
something from your past comes back at you like a little silver bullet you know
you have to bite on? I’m not talking
cataclysmic moments, just those that make you smile a wry smile and say: “Yep,
I had that one coming.”
At some point, every one of us
has longed for that fuzzy ultimate feel-good sense of being regarded as the
perfect inhabitant of a perfect world by our perfect partner.
Whatever the problem is, love is
the answer. Love is all you need, after
all. Flimsy love stories still
impact on our psyche at the subliminal level, teaching us that […]
Denial isn’t a river in Egypt. It’s
actually a snowball hurtling down a steep slope, becoming ever bigger
and gathering momentum as it goes. Once you’ve started explaining his
bad behaviours away, you just keep on doing it, way beyond the dictates
of common sense and self-respect. Having put him on a pedestal, you’re
left in the mud and slime […]
How then can you feel good about yourself, when you feel terrible? By consciously employing the same process to create the result that you desire, that someone else used to control and diminish you.
That process is language. You know it works, because of the havoc it has wreaked on you.
So you are licking your wounds. Your
relationship came to a bad end. Your fairy prince turned into a swine.
The romance that started magically in your dream castle ended up in a
grotty sty. As for your swain, well, he ended up smelling of a number
of things; but roses was not one of them.
confidence has been […]
Addiction to drugs, alcohol and gambling are easy enough to identify. The addiction to emotionally and physically abusive behaviour is generally far less readily identifiable, at least to the woman who is on the receiving end of it.
1. Sticks and stones won’t break my bones” – and words won’t leave any measurable physical damage, but they will cause progressive, long-term harm. Never underestimate the power of words: words are used to brainwash.
Being told you are “stupid”, “ugly”, “lazy” or “worthless” is never acceptable. The first times you hear it, it will hurt, naturally. But in time […]
Do you ever think about the reasons why you matter?
In this article we need to do something that you probably don’t do nearly enough – and that is, look at the reasons why you matter. You don’t have to be with a Narcissist or emotional abuser long to start to feel that you really don’t […]
The 5 Simple Steps to Healing from Narcissistic Abuse
Over the next 5 days, I'll send you some lessons and tips that I've found have really helped women to heal from narcissistic abuse. Starting with the basics.