Once we felt utterly devoid of resources. But no more. We struggled, we learned and we came through. In retrospect, I could wish that we had known then that all we had to do was what we could with what we had from where we were. It would have made those early steps far easier along the journey we still travel joyfully.
The problem of domestic violence in the UK is huge and the long term cost to society is, probably, incalculable. It is easy to see how, from every point of view “sorry seems to be the cheapest word”.
Harriet*’s face had been etched into a mask of anxiety and
pain by the years spent putting herself last while she tried to make bad
relationships work. She came up to me
on the last day of the course I’d been running on Domestic Violence Recovery to
tell me how far she had come along her journey.
Most people can’t get behind the wheel of a car for the
first time and drive away like a seasoned driver. But one or two can.
Most people can’t sit down at a piano for the first time
and play a Mozart sonata; although you might find the odd one or two who can
play whatever they hear by hear.Most […]
Like many other women of her age whose marriage finally founders, she had, she said, lost her voice. She had had to defer to her husband for years on end. Her husband had made her feel small, stupid and inadequate. He was, she said, ‘a strong personality’; while she is ‘sensitive’.
That, of course, is one interpretation.
We live in a society where people habitually say rude, abrasive, sometimes clever, things to each other, which are often quite funny. But rude, abrasive words have the power to chip away at a person until they break them into small pieces.
One of the key stages in abuse recovery is making the
shift from isolation into a sense of community. Once can look past the blinkers of isolation, you see many
wonderful people along your way – including yourself.
This was sent to me by ezine reader Karen Hammond. Karen’s sharing brought light to the
domestic violence recovery group at my […]
is often a scowl at home” (Alfred, Lord Tennyson)
It’s often said that when Life, or The Universe, has
something to teach you, it keeps putting that lesson in front of you until you
finally get it.
(Equally, you could argue that sometimes you miss
something the first zillion times, because you’re not programmed to notice
it. So you keep […]
The 5 Simple Steps to Healing from Narcissistic Abuse
Over the next 5 days, I'll send you some lessons and tips that I've found have really helped women to heal from narcissistic abuse. Starting with the basics.