abused women

Falling in love stinks when…

17 November 2010

Falling-In-Love, as far as I can see, is about leaping without looking. Falling-In-Love lays you open to the whole unsavory pack of jerks, abusers, and narcissists. I asked my client whether she would take a job without first finding out about the pay and terms of employment. She sounded surprised. She answered, briskly: “Of course not.” Then she saw the connection. You don’t have to fall in love on Day 1, Day 2, or Day 20. Falling-In-Love is optional, not obligatory – although it is a neat way of silencing the little voice in your head that says: “Er… I don’t think so. This one is NOT for me!”

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“What’s wrong with me?”

10 November 2010

There comes a point in every abusive relationship when you know you should get out. Your abusive partner is making you miserable, you know the relationship is all wrong and, as far as you can see, your life has stopped dead… But still you stay. You know you should leave, but you don’t.
Instead, you ask ourself: “What’s wrong with me?”

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Why Relationships Don’t Work

12 October 2010

Not all women are abused at some point in there life – although a lot are. Not a lot of us are taught how to make good relationships. Instead, we’re taught how to put ourselves last. After 7 years of research, I’ve written a report about how women are PROGRAMMED to sabotage their relationship chances.

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“What if he were gay?”

3 October 2010

The sexuality of abusive men is perverted. They use – or withhold – sex for control, not love. They ‘relate’ to their partner in a damaging way. That is a feature of the breed. I am very happy to generalize about abusive men; because they are, ultimately, eerily like clones. They all share the same loathing for women. They all abuse their partners in very similar ways.

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Different kinds of bad relationships

14 September 2010

Wouldn’t it be nice if we only had to experience being ill-treated by one man, and we learned from it never to make certain mistakes again? For most of us, the reality is slightly different. We learn that a certain kind of man treated us badly, in a certain kind of way, and we resolve never to make that mistake again. Sadly, we don’t think that we could be vulnerable to different, but equally calamitous, mistakes. That is precisely why we repeat them.

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